Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.Philippians 4:8

My intention over the next 8 months, Lord willing, is to focus on one aspect for a whole month. My blog post will be about “whatever is true”. You can find a reading/writing schedule below.

What is “true”?

What should we be thinking about? The entirety of God’s inspired word (aka the Bible) is what first comes to my mind. I looked “true” up. This is what I found:

TRUE: fact; faithful; loyal; free from falsehood; keeping promises; honest; exact; straight; real, not pretend

I have made a list of 30 verses that speak to the truth of God, 1 verse per day in September. I hope it will serve to encourage and comfort you and bring you and your children closer to God. Download it below.

Teach the Children

1. Journal & Discuss

2. Counting

3. Play “Telephone”

4. Play “True or False”

1. Journal and discuss

My kids and I will be journaling and discussing these verses, at least Monday-Friday. I like for them to practice their reading and writing with scriptures. Alternatively, you could pick one verse per week and help your kids memorize that one scripture.

3. Play “Telephone”

Playing a game of telephone with your kids can make you feel nostalgic. It can also give you an opportunity to discuss what is true and how easy it is for the truth to be distorted. It can also be a good opportunity to discuss what to do when we find out we have somehow become a part of sharing a distorted truth. For those who don’t know, telephone is when you whisper a word or phrase in one person’s ear and then they share with their neighbor until the phrase makes it all the way around the group. The last person says what they heard. I have never been a part of a group that got it right. Nobody intentionally says the wrong thing, but it doesn’t take a very big group for words to get skewed.

Come back in October for “whatever is honorable”.

January - Lovely

February - Commendable

March - Excellence

April - Worthy of Praise

How many times have you made plans only for them to fall through? How do you handle your plans falling apart?
James 4:13-15 encourages us to not take tomorrow for granted as tomorrow is not promised. Instead we should say “if the Lord wills…”

If you want to hear all about our adventures, continue reading. If you’re just here for how to reframe when plans fall through, click here.

We are currently on vacation. A vacation that has gone “wrong” at every turn. We started out leaving late from Pennsylvania and just before we made it to our first stop in North Carolina our car started overheating.

Because we left late, we missed dinner with friends. We had car problems which led to us being in North Carolina for three extra nights. Our poor friends were amazing hosts to unplanned guests, and there were 7 of us at that point.

So we left North Carolina 3 days late and headed to see our oldest son. We had planned to attend church with him and then take him along on our vacation. We missed church (we headed to see him on Tuesday instead of Saturday) and instead met him near the airport he would fly back to. We stopped for the night and continued on the next day skipping a couple of extra stops we had hoped to make.

Our oldest son and my husband took turns driving overnight and got us all the way to my husband’s mother’s house. We didn’t have as much time there as we had hoped but we were so happy to see family. We stayed one day more than we had initially planned, but couldn’t make up all of our planned time because our oldest son had to get back in time for work and he had purchased a plane ticket to fly out of Colorado. He is in the military so his plans had to stick 🙂 . 

We cut just enough time from our planned arrival in Colorado that he could make his flight Monday morning. We did have one dinner with my entire family from two sets of my grandparents, to my parents, and my siblings and their spouses and children. It was a little crazy to have 30 people in one house, but it was so wonderful! I am so blessed to have so much family in my life!

Because we had to leave New Mexico a day later than originally planned we missed a planned birthday party with cousins. My 3 youngest and Mollie’s 3 youngest all have summer birthdays. Mine have never had a birthday celebration with grandparents, cousins, aunts, and uncles, so we were super excited, but it didn’t work out. More plans falling through.

We took the opportunity to move forward with birthday party plans, it wasn’t going to be as big, but at least all the cousins would be together. The plan was to have a camping/s’more birthday party outside at my brother’s house (he happens to be married to the wonderful Mollie). But just as so many other plans changed on this trip, things weren’t lining up Monday for a birthday party either.

We were an hour late (and we’re the ones on vacation), it rained (makes it hard to be outside and have a fire to roast marshmallows for s’mores). Mollie did an amazing job of fixing dinner for everyone and making the night special for my birthday kids.

Tuesday, things were finally going as planned. We headed to our favorite local waterfalls. We ate lunch together and then we split into two groups. Some of us (moms and younger kids) headed to the falls and the others (grandpas, dads, and the older kids) headed above the falls. We have been hiking to the falls for 40+ years, we haven’t hiked above the falls in about 20 years.

Those of us who hiked to the falls played in the Piedra River a little bit and let the kids be mountain goats (climbing more than was good for my nerves HA!). The skies were starting to get dark so we decided to head back to the vehicles before it rained.

We got the kids drinks and snacks when we got back to the cars and settled into chairs for what we thought would be a short wait for the others. Turns out the others were having more adventure than was planned. 

Those who hiked above the falls discovered trails that were hard to find and they were steeper and rockier than remembered. My 86-yr-old grandfather, my dad, my husband and 5 kids ranging from 9-17 were on the hike. They saw some beautiful views, but worried us all when they didn’t get back to the vehicles until 9pm. It was getting dark and the only reason we knew they were coming down was because someone was whistling. I’ve never been so happy to hear whistling!  

The rest of the week went as planned, maybe because we didn’t have many plans other than to enjoy family. 🙂

Then Saturday night rolls around and we are preparing to leave early the next morning. At dinner my older brother shared that he had found a vehicle for us (remember everything began to fall apart because our vehicle was not doing well on the trip). AND my daughter convinced my dad and her dad to say yes to her bringing a puppy home. So now we decided to stick around on Sunday to look at a vehicle and get a puppy ready for a 2,000 mile road trip.

Monday morning I began typing this and I am finally posting on Friday because I couldn’t get it done remotely as we travelled. We have made it home, safely and with NO car problems.

People plan and God laughs

I have made so many plans in my life that don’t work out. I wonder how many times I have to learn the lesson that ultimately God’s plans are ALWAYS better than mine!

Only God knows what our futures hold. I do believe making plans and thinking of our futures does not go against God, but we have to remember to keep God first. If the Lord wills, we will do this or that… (James 4:13-15 paraphrased). Romans 8:6 For to set the mind on the flesh is death but to set the mind on the spirit is life and peace.

God first, everything else second.

Matthew 6:33 ESV Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. One thing I have found, is that if you are focused on God when your plans fall through it is easier to see the blessings.

• Stuck in North Carolina for 3 extra days. The blessing? I was able to spend the better part of 3 days talking to a dear sweet friend and this was much needed food for my soul. What an encouragement our conversations were.

• Left New Mexico Sunday morning instead of Saturday. The blessing? We were able to spend more time with a nephew and his kids than we would have otherwise, and we fit in a hike my husband has wanted to do again for the last 20 years.

• We missed the planned birthday party on Saturday night. The blessing? I was able to spend the day at my sister’s house baking 3 cakes with her, and my kids were able to spend time with her kids. Cousin time is so precious! Blessing #2 I was able to sit around a campfire at my brother’s house, just his family and mine. I got to tell his kids stories about him. We sang songs while the kids roasted marshmallows. This was unplanned, but one of my favorite parts of our trip.

• We didn’t leave the falls “on time”. The blessing? My son and his cousin were the two oldest kids on the hike above the falls, they were put in charge of making sure their Great-Grandpa made it down safely. The bond this created between the three of them is a bigger blessing than I could have imagined. I know they are blessed to have their Great-Grandpa in their life! He told everyone who would listen how thankful he was for those two boys. They put grandpa first and would take turns staying with him while the other would scout the trails to find the safest way down. Blessing #2 We were able to see how God was watching over us. We have been up there before when the rain came. As a result there was a lot of concern about going off the road. It never did anything more than sprinkled on us; however, down below the mountain it rained so much that my brothers (who had to work) were concerned we were stuck on the mountain because roads near their homes had 2 feet of water on them. They actually were headed to come find us about the time we finally returned to cell service and we were able to tell them we were all fine. So we stopped them just before they were out of cell service, had timing been just a little off, we could have met each other and not known. 

• We didn’t leave for home on time. The blessing? I got to stay one more day with my family. I was also able to go to church where I spent much of my growing up years. It was so good to see some familiar faces of sweet women who have been such an encouragement in my momma journey!

Keep going

Sometimes you can plan everything out and all goes according to plan. Other times it feels like nothing is working out right. This can be so frustrating and you want to throw in the towel. DON’T!

Keep moving forward.

Look for those silver linings.

Seek out how God is working through your circumstances.

Check your focus. Are you focused on the flesh or the spirit?

I can see how my plans falling apart has led me and members of my family to grow. I pray these experiences continue to influence us and cause us to grow to God.

How do you recover from changing plans?

For the month of June we will be celebrating fathers. We are taking turns sharing our fathers and husbands with you. Please join us in our celebration, we would love to hear about the special dads in your life. (Keep reading all the way to the bottom to learn more.)

Father’s Day has brought up some weird emotions for me since I became a mom in 2004. I spent 6 years feeling like I failed my son because he only had “substitutes”. I am so grateful to those men who influenced him in those first years. Pappy, Grandpa, Papa, Kirk, Trevor, Aaron, I see their influences in who my first child is.

My husband, my baby brother, my dad, my big brother, and my brother-in-law

Then when he was 5 years old, we met a new guy. He knew how to win my son over – fishing and shooting guns at Bass Pro. Watching Chad be daddy to his kids and interact with my kid won me over and we were married by the end of the year. Watching my husband be daddy to all 6 of our kids is one of my favorite things!

The first fishing trip with the “new guy” and his kids

They say you marry your dad, and my mom and I have laughed over how similar my husband and dad are.

For the Love of God

Both men make church and serving God a priority in their lives and a priority for their children. This is something people can see in many facets of their lives

Growing up I remember always being at church, it was always a priority for our family. We invited friends. Any time the building was open, we were there. One of my fondest memories of my childhood is hearing my dad whistle as he worked. Most often it was “This World Is Not My Home“. This is something I remember my grandpa doing as well when we would go to visit.

My husband makes church a priority for our family also. And it is not just to attend on Sunday mornings and then get on with our lives. Church and God are a big part of our life. My husband “preaches” to anyone who works for him. He owns his own business and it is his ministry. He invites customers, employees, anyone who will listen, to join us at church. He also shares how God has been a part of his life and how he has shown Himself over the years. Several employees and customers have listened to him, and come to church with us. A couple have even stuck around.

This is a picture of my husband and two of our sons, it was the babies first week at church. I love watching him be daddy!

Seeing the opportunities for teachable one-on-one moments

One of my favorite memories with my dad is making breakfast with him. I was an early riser, so that meant I got to be with my dad all by myself. I felt so special when he would share his secrets for making great eggs with me. I still think of him as I make breakfast for my family.

My husband is so patient with our kids. When he has a task they’re interested in, he takes the time to teach them how to do the task. One of my favorite pictures is from an afternoon brake change.

 Work, work, work

I grew up on a ranch, actually a few different ranches. I treasure the experiences that gave us. My dad worked hard. But because his work was at our home we got to work with him. I was the second oldest and a girl so generally my older brother was the one who helped Dad.

However, I remember one particular occasion I was needed. I was terrified to drive my dad’s Bobcat skidsteer, but that was the task at hand. I drove it until I got to a hill, then I FROZE. So Dad climbed onto the attachment and drove the skidsteer down the hill for me. Then I continued on to where we were working that day. We were clearing trees out. I was taking down the smaller ones and my dad had a bigger machine for the bigger trees. One important role dads fill is to teach us to do the hard things. Sometimes we need a little push to venture out of our comfort zones. However, once we accomplish those tasks, we are given a boost in self-esteem. I was able to drive that skidsteer home!

Our kids love to go to work with Dad, at least until they get older 🙂 My husband allows them to help as much as possible. Teaching them to use power tools, pushing my comfort zone as to when I think they should. They’ve learned to use hammers and screwdrivers, wrenches, how to grill, how to fish and shoot guns.

Time for fun

Although the men in my life are hard working and spend much of their time working to provide for their families. They do find time to have some fun!

Family time was important as we were growing up. We would ride horses, fish, hunt, hike, and go camping as a family.

My dad getting a horse ready to ride for my daughter

My husband is the fun one, just ask my kids. Just today, we spent the afternoon on the creek. This is one of our favorite family fun activities. Some days we just go splash around. Other times we float down the river in canoes, kayaks, and tubes. He has also helped the kids build a tree house. He has coached basketball. He built a “supersled” and loves sharing it with the kids. These are just a few of the ways my husband makes sure fun is infused in our family life.

I am One Blessed Momma!

The dads and grandpas and uncles I am surrounded by have made me the mom I am. I am so grateful for how God has shown up in my life through these men.

I started this post with how I felt like I failed my son because he didn’t have a dad for the first 5 years of his life. If you find yourself in the same position, no matter the reason, don’t allow yourself to sit in feelings of failure.

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28 ESV

Even if you messed up and that’s the reason you are a single mom, God offers forgiveness. Take it, repent of whatever your part is, and move forward. If you sit in the failure feelings and the bitterness, you can’t be the mom God created you to be.

Some of the best advice I ever received was to not be both mom and dad. You aren’t, and you can’t be. Include male role models in your child(ren)’s life – grandpas, uncles, friends; find new ones if you need to. Don’t be negative about their dad in front of your children. Your kids don’t need the drama. If you need to vent, find a friend, not your child.